26 November 2007

you know you're jet lagged when...

it's 237am and you're not going to sleep anytime soon (mostly becuase you slept till 230pm this arvo).

so, instead, i'm gonna do the most productive thing ever and create a "you know you've studied abroad in australia when.." mostly because i was inspired by a list i found on the internet that is only halfway decent, and some of the things i reckon were inside jokes for this person's own time there.

so, without further ado, i'm making these up on the spot and will probably need to add more later when i think of them,

you know you've studied abroad in australia when....!

...you became a pro at knowing world times ("oh, it's noon here? that means it's 6 in bangledesh and 8 in london and too late to call home")

...without skype, you probably never would have talked to your family after the first 2 weeks

...aussies told you about the much-feared 'dropbears' and you believed them

...then, when you found out they were kidding, you still proceeded to call koalas 'dropbears' because it made them potentially interesting, rather than just the boring sleeping buggers that they are

...tim tams and cadbury became a suitable meal so long as you supplemented it with a fruit

...you began to shorten every word you possibly could (brekky, arvo, macca's, chocky, etc..)

...50c cones at maccas were a must every time in the cbd

...oh yeah, downtown does not exist, it's the city centre or, more likely, the cbd

...aussies tried to get you to try vegemite, but you knew better

...but then ate it drunk one night (NEVER AGAIN!)

...bad day? tim tam slams make it all better

...you have been to more parts of australia than the average australian

...your final exams are worth more than 50% of your grade

...because you only have 2 asessments a semester

...you own multiple thongs because you like to match your outfits

...you know what a thong actually is (and you have hardcore tanlines from them)

...when you tell people about your eleven hours of class, they know you are an arts student

...and it's not class, it's subjects

...you live in a college but go to university

...aussies shun you for your love of peanut butter and jelly

...and they can't comprehend peanut butter and chocolate until you get them addicted to reeses' sent from home ("can you ask your parents to send more???")

...leggings aren't just for gymnasts anymore

...you became a hardcore environmentalist when it came to saving plastic bags

...but can't be bothered to take a 4 minute shower, no matter how low the reservoirs are

...speaking of which, you refuse to believe there's a drought when it rains as much as it does

...it's not unusual for it to be raining, then sunny, then raining, then sunny, then raining, then sunny, then raining, then sunny, then raining...within a 30 minute period.

...oh, it might hail too.

...there are "two dollar coins" and "laundry dollars" and "macca's cone coins"

...you have no problem line drying your laundry in order to save that dollar

...warm weather was a nice welcome until you realized it brought heaps and heaps of FLIES

...you have been stopped by the tramcops and lived to tell the tale (without a ticket!)

...you knew what you were doing each night based on the day of the week: mondays at turf, tuesdays at eurotrash, wednesdays at pa's, thursdays at pugg's, friday's at persy's, and saturday and sunday were days of rest (sometimes).

...the guys wear shorter shorts than you do

...aussie rules footy became the greatest sport ever

...pies are made out of meats, not fruits

...pumpkin pie doesn't exist, but you eat roasted pumpkin regularly

...sticky. date. pudding.

...you found nemo while snorkeling the great barrier reef

...you went surfing in cold & rainy weather because the waves were better

...you stayed in a hostel because it offered a free beer on arrival

...you shared a room with 7 other people of different sexes, ethnicities, and showering preferences.

...you still completely miss the point of cricket.

...you could never turn down 7$ for 4 litres of wine. much love, goon.

...you've drank out of a goon bag in public

...you just don't root for a footy team (and you cringed when other americans said they did)

...you wondered why the half-flush and full-flush weren't just labeled "#1" and "#2"

...you know the toilets don't spin in any direction, just downward

...you've handfed kangaroos and wallabies, and it never got old

...you walk everywhere to save tram money, but when you have to buy a tram ticket, you make sure to get your money's worth ("who wants to go to st kilda??")

...no matter how hot the day got, you refused to go swimming in st. kilda

...you have seen more of melbourne than any australian.

...you know it's not ketchup, it's tomato sauce

...tomato sauce comes in easy-to-squeeze packets, but hell if you're gonna pay 30c for it

...you consider everyone to be your mate

...you got disappointed when you realized that most aussies do not greet you saying "gday mate"

...you have picked up on the dance floor of pugg's

...and pa's

...and eurotrash

...but not turf, you have standards

...you are more than willing to spend more to fly with qantas (free alcohol!)

...you walked into a shop and before the attendant could say anything you say "how ya goin?"

...you read for your subjects diligently for the first 2 weeks, then knew better

...you learned how to properly BS your way through any tutorial

...you say 'tea' instead of dinner

...you know the difference between brekky, lunch, afternoon tea, tea, and supper

...you know the XXXX is not a porn rating

...and you got excited when you ordered a 'pot of gold' in queensland

...you know each states' beer

...premixed cans of alcohol just made things so much easier

...the phrase 'i reckon' doesn't mean you're a hillbilly from the South

...you'll forever call them sunnies and bathers

...you got excited the first time you unknowingly pronounced 'banana' the aussie way

...you can tell the difference between a british, australian, and new zealand accent

...you know that new zealanders are to australia what canadians are to the USA

...no matter way day of the week, or what the weather, chances are, there's a BBQ on southlawn (free food!)

...boost juice became the answer to the worst cheap redwine hangover

...dressing like harry potter for tea lost its novelty, fast

...no matter how bad things get, no worries.

...you know the difference between chips, chips, and chips

...you learned which way to look when you cross the street (or, if you are in sydney, you just look down to know which way to look)

...the first time an aussie said something was "cool as" you waited for them to finish

...you quickly learned aussie beer >>>>>> american beer

...you know biscuits are cookies, and scones are biscuits, and pastries are scones. phew.


...walking home barefoot is nothing to be ashamed of (especially if the trams stopped running and your shoes are giving you blisters)

...when someone yells "aussie aussie aussie!" you know how to respond ("oi oi oi!")

...you know good mexican food is nonexistent

...aussie guys wear skinnier jeans than you do

...you end every sentence as if you are asking a question

...freddo frogs and carmello koalas

...bundy & coke was for bogans (but you drank it anyway)

...you knew which items were acceptable to buy homebrand (home brand timtams = NOT)

...on at least one occassion, kids streaked through your lectures

...and your lecturer just kept lecturing

...you know kookaburras are nice to look at...but hearing them at 430am SCREECHING is enough to make you want to wipe them out of existence

...you have gotten a bag of chips, a slice of pizza, 2 potato cakes, and a dimsim from smiley's..all for only $1.70

...you may not know what dimsims actually are made of, but you know they are NOT dimsums.

...you ate kangaroo and enjoyed the horrified reactions of people back home

...you are amazed by the many flavours of kitkat

...you could spot another american kilometers away (north face, anyone?)

...you quickly learned the conversions to kilometers and celsius

...even with only 5 tv channels, there is still always something to watch

...you got mad at your friends when they told you what happened on (insert tv series) because it hasn't aired yet in AUS

...no one wears UGG boots in public

...it's not "aus-tray-lee-a", it's just "stray-ya"

...you begin to wear sunscreen no matter how cold or cloudy it is

...lollies don't have a stick, licorice is black, jelly is jell-o, capsicum is red pepper, not is zero, zee is zed, and you went on holidays, not vacations.

...by the end of the trip, you could pull off at least a half-convincing accent (enough to fool drunk aussies or new americans)


...you can't be bothered to start your 2000 word essay.

...and it's essay, not paper, no matter how many words it is.

...you start adding the letter U to words, and replace Z for the much more sensible S

...you tell your american friends to skul their beer and they just don't understand

...you know melbourne is 'melbin', brisbane is 'brisbin', cairns is 'cans', and canberra is 'canbra'...and hearing it pronounced another way makes you cringe

...but queensland is still queens-land.

...you know pedestrians never really have the right of way

...the city circle tram is not for tourists, just people too cheap to spend 3.30$ on a ticket

...swot vac was an excuse for a holiday

...sweet, ripper, mad, rad, tops, and sick all mean good. stick bloody in front of it when you REALLY mean it.

...when you got cold, you just threw on a jumper

ok.im gonna stop now. i could seriously go on and on and on...

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